And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
