I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
