I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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