this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
