I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
