You're my little dorito
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
