You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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