im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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