We won't sleep together?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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