So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
