My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
