Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
