I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
