is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
