i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
