It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
