shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
