I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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