med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Randomize
