You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Randomize
