I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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