just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
