That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
