so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
