I just cut my nipple shaving
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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