Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
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