Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
