im drinking this country out of the recession.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
