She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
