and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Randomize
