I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
well you can't waste a boner
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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