Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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