It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I don't deserve a penis
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
