there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
