Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
