I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
