Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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