don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
