But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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