i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
