My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
What drink are we having for lunch?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
