If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
you would pick up someone in the library
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
