You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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