She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
