I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
