if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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