My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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