He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Randomize
