Duck Duck Cougar?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Randomize
