the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize